What man in his right mind would ever willingly enter a situation with responsibilities and non-fun right off the bat!? I have so many friends who have had or are having problems with their men. Mostly first marriages...which I guess says that when you DO find a guy who willingly enters an already very adult and responsibility laden situation (i.e. second marriage with kids), they tend to actually stick around and keep their promises...so that's a bonus...but, where are these men? I can't even imagine where they are...I am constantly seeing examples of boys who run as soon as things get "too hard" and things aren't even THAT hard when they go running. Where are these men who sign up for "hard" right from the start? And then...stay!?
I would think them a myth if I didn't have a couple of examples already...
But it is a sad and scary thought, as you clean up yet another gross mess, to realize that you may just end up alone because no one is strong enough, brave enough, to deal with the less fun side of life with you...and the thing is...it is so much nicer, so much more fun, when you don't have to go it alone...I mean, isn't that the whole point?
I try not to think like this very much, and really it isn't something I worry about a whole lot right now, who has the time? And since I'm not ready to find this strange breed of male that sticks around, it is pointless to spend time worrying about it all...
But it does pop in my head sometimes...and I just wonder how things will turn out. You never do know do you?
And then I realized that that is the exact reason why the new girlfriend bothers me so much. She is SO chipper and upbeat...I mean to a point where it just doesn't seem real at all. No one is THAT happy all the time.(Ok, the deliberate misspelling of words, weird sentence structure and all caps bugs me too, but for an entirely different reason) And maybe she is chipper and upbeat all the time, and good for her if she is. But it bothers me, or at least it did, until now. It made me feel grumpy. It made me doubt myself. Because it made me think that guys want someone who is happy as a clam all the time, someone who doesn't ever get upset, someone who is always calm and ready to comfort them, but never needs comforting...
Maybe some guys do want that. I think those are the same guys who go running when things get tough, or rather, too real...Because the men I have seen who married women who already have a kid or two, did not marry chipper, upbeat women. They married downright basketcases, grumps, bitches (I say this with love!), and crazy women....REAL women.
I'm grumpy, I can be crazy, I can be a bitch, I sometimes snap at people for no reason, I get depressed, I have sad days for no reason, I jump to conclusions, I cry, I yell on the rare occasion, I get angry, I have basketcase moments.
I am a real woman...
I'm ok with that.
And I do hope that someday I will meet someone who is also ok with that. Because, it would be really nice to have someone to help clean up the poo & throw up...and still want to hold me close afterwards...
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