Thursday, January 6, 2011

A Little Break from Love

I realized that this is the first time ever, in my whole entire life (while single), that my main focus and wish for the new year has not been somehow related to romantic Love. I think this could be a very good thing!

(Note: I spell romantic Love with a capital "L" for two reasons. 1. It helps differentiate between general love and the romantic kind. 2. There never seems to be a word strong enough, special enough, powerful enough to really caputre what romantic Love is, therefor, I feel it should at the very least be capitalized.)

I know there are many women who jump from relationship to relationship, or stay in not so good relationships, because they are afraid to be alone. I am not one of those women. I never have been, even in my less-than-confident teenage years. I've never felt as if I really needed a man to complete me. But, I have always loved Love. Always dreamed about True Love. Even in preschool I had "boyfriends". They would give me kisses on the cheek, and give me their cookies at lunch. Or if I liked a boy who didn't like me, I would chase him around and try to kiss HIM on the cheek. I even had a fake wedding once to one of the boys I captured. I have to hand it to him, he was quite a trooper going along with my silly little wedding.
In elementary school I had two boys fighting over me. One tried to woo me with rose perfume and a kiss on the cheek. Not to be out done, the other boy wooed me with a giant cardboard robot with "I LOVE SANDY" and hearts written all over it in silver paint. Guess which boy I chose?

Looking back, I can see that there were very few times in my life that I didn't have a guy I was interested in. In fact, up until now, the longest I went with absolutely no guy in my life (and no guy I wanted in my life) was 3 months. And that was because I had "given up" on men. Didn't last very long, and I wasn't exactly happy about the Love hiatus. I still pined and worried that I would never find Love.

I've talked about Love a whole lot in this blog, and it will likely continue to be a big theme. Love is my thing. All kinds of love, but especially romantic Love. I just love it! I love the feeling. I love the complexity and simpleness of it. I love the magick of it. I love hearing about Love and seeing people in love, young and old. I just love Love.
So, no worries, I've not given up on Love, or men, or anything like that. Not at all. I just feel that after 30.5 years of being all about romantic Love (yes, even as a baby I cooed and flirted with men. There are pictures to prove it!). It is time to give myself a little break from it. Perhaps it will help me gain some perspective.
Of course, I still wish for Love, but this year, it is not something I am looking for. Not just because I am not ready for it (though that is probably a big part of it) but because I have other things that I want to focus on right now. Myself, my son, and what I really want out of this life of mine.
These past 8 months I have not had any romantic relationships, and I've not really wanted one, but Love still ruled my life a bit. The loss of it, the lack of it, and wishing for it (and worrying about never getting it) in the future.

I am letting all of that go now. I am choosing to take a break from Love for this year. No dating, no crushes (except for my silly crushes on bank employees, movie stars, and Ross security guards...maybe) no pining, no romance.

I never - not in a million years - thought I would want to take a break from Love. I am actually really excited about it too! It is freeing, exciting, and very different.
I already feel like a whole new me!







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